Thoughts On Pregnancy & How It’s Affected My Brain
I know that since becoming pregnant, it may seem like I have fallen off the face of the internet. And I basically have. Aside from being so incredibly sick (actually puking, everyday), I have been ridiculously tired! A zombie even! Nobody really told me about that. It’s been so tricky trying to find a balance between work, baby, getting settled into our new place, and trying to be a good wife to Logan. I’ve pretty much failed on all fronts. It’s taken me weeks to figure out a system and I’m finally starting to feel like myself. Just now! I’m almost 6 months in and am just starting to bounce back!! What the?!?
I feel like I’ve experienced a major paradigm shift in the last few weeks. I have wanted to be pregnant for years. It was all consuming and because it didn’t happen, I buried myself in work. I was literally working 90 hours a week and trying to focus on my career and the growth of this blog. And then BAM! We got pregnant! Like some miracle out of left field, it just came so unexpectedly and I was forced to quickly adjust to my new life. Instead of a desk, I was in bed or in the bathroom! (Mostly in bed.) Things were definitely quiet around here and people didn’t know why. I was too tired to get anything done, and I wasn’t ready to tell anyone what was happening until I was sure it was pretty solid. These things can be taken away as quickly as they come, ya know?
Every one of you has been so supportive and sweet since finding out the news and have made me realize why I created this blog in the first place. I love coming to this lil’ internet space to connect and make friends. Sure, I want to create projects and content that you will appreciate and be inspired to make on your own. I want this to be a beautiful space! But, I also want this to be a real space. I’ve stepped back a bit because I’ve been focusing more on little girl and less on what I say and do here. I realized that I don’t have to do that! I want to be able to have discussions about all sorts of topics. I want to hear your thoughts. I most definitely need to hear your advice. I’ll still be sharing DIYs and other types of posts, but I’m also going to kick things up a notch and start talking about my life and what’s going on behind the scenes. Old friend or new friend, I hope you’ll stick around! I need ya!
I’m currently 24 weeks along with BG-dub (our affectionate nickname for Baby Girl Ward), and it’s been a crazy six months. If you have talked to me in person, I apologize for the flightiness. I just can’t help myself these days! Up until now, I’ve been ridiculously sick. Before she was kicking, it was the only reassurance I had that she was still in there packin’ on the pounds. Isn’t that crazy? Were you or do you know someone who thought that way? I absolutely hated the puking, but I was comforted after each time it happened. For the last two weeks, she has been a crazy kicker and it’s amazing to watch and feel. I try to get work done during the day, but each time she kicks, I sit down for 20 minutes and poke back to provoke her and play with her! Oh my. The first time it happened, I knew this was all worth it. Make me puke all you want, baby. I’ll take it.
I’m truly sorry for being so slow to come back here, but I’m ready to work. I’m ready to play. Thank you so much for being amazing and supportive and cool and understanding. I could just marry you guys if I wasn’t already hitched. ;)